Not in charge

Tonight I move away
from what has become
too much
content
too many sentences
paragraphs
intent to be related to

I move away because
at this time I do not relate
one of these spells of time
wherein I have gathered
all unnecessary pieces
some are enormous
and thrown them into the abyss
some seemed to be precious
so I may have tenderly placed them
on the conveyor belt heading out
to the great place of transformation
and ask will I ever
successfully shapeshift into
the type of being that balances layers of
internal complicating and conflicting worlds
yet still is able to walk in the world of humans
jumping after the dangling carrots of normalcy
normal lives, normal relationships
and many do say that this bizarre notion
will die someday
the snow globe shaken up in your hand,
telling winter that:
"I can imitate your magic
so poorly and still
I am a delight to the eyes
of the consumer"

I step away from consuming
I move away into unfettered silence
the only movement going now
is a recording of water
since I
am thirsty for the real thing
the real vulnerable aching river flow
the ocean with unmasked salty glow
throwing wave after wave
in the direction of the abyss

we make mandalas to pay homage to
what nature does so organically, so easily
as we are taking snapshots of sunsets and sunrises,
congratulating ourselves for noticing them,
nature knows no fear in these cycles of
beauty created and destroyed
horrors to us because of how moronically dependent
we have become on nature not acting out
in order to protect us.

This hit me years ago,
the indifference
within the creating of the storms and fires and all that she has
in her arsenal
can shift to love as one of the
Great Mother's many vibratory realities,
she will reflect it back to us
in the alchemy of our relation to and reverence for her
being at peace with the death and destruction necessary to her
artistic process.
we are not in charge,
foolish to ever think we were.

we will land

patience pours from the stillness
of your activities

in the gaze of yours with that
special blend of what you covet
what you share
what you don't know you are sharing
I never met a person more caring

in the fights
in the throws of passion
in where I am
and where I am asking
in the mystical
and so very precious knowing of you
feeling of you
all the way from skin and flesh
and muscle and bones
to the psychic clairaudient constant telephones
I find myself answering
and hanging up and pushing all that

morbid beautiful information from dreams
from the back of our conversations and silences
inside and through out those private places we shared
wrapped around each other like phone cords intertwined
all at once neutral
all at once furious
with the state of the world
we railed against

inside the decision to bring the knife to the
throat of each possibility and
turn back

in that never using force to get what we want

giving into

the oblique nature of our first tender interactions
the way you got in
without the use of force and
how confused and happy and scared that left me
you never left me
so far
you have never
employed the use of force and this
leaves us spinning spiraling up

falling in patterns invisible to most eyes
creating indifference within the hearts and minds of
those who find it necessary to push back, push into
a life of severance

while I lay more ground work for reverence

we fall and then more so float with the pressure of the subtle wind
just a whisper of a breeze, redefining strength to include

us as leaves free falling
trusting we will land
where we are magnetized to be
vibrating this peace so effortlessly

Relating to this, maybe some of you do too!

1. "The Empowered Feminine is not the Woman who has finally, painstakingly fixed her flaws.
   She is the Woman who has stopped apologising for them.
2. The Empowered Fem...inine is not the Woman who has conquered fear.
   She is the Woman who knows well there is no courage without fear.
3. The Empowered Feminine is not the Woman who has it all figured out.
   She is the Woman who steps in to uncertainty and dances with the Mystery.
4. The Empowered Feminine is not the Woman who has never fallen or failed.
   She is the Woman with scars on her hands and knees, some of which may still be bleeding.
5. The Empowered Feminine is not the Woman who never cries.
   She is the Woman who dares to feel vulnerably and care deeply.
6. The Empowered Feminine is not in competition with other Women.
   She is a diamond in a sky full of stars.
7. The Empowered Feminine is not the Woman playing the blame game.
   She is the one whose divine assignment is the solution.
8. The Empowered Feminine is not the Woman waiting for the approval of others.
   She gives her own permission.
9. She has heard the call.
   And she’s not waiting any more."

Ascended master Jesus and the Shaman

I had a beautiful conversation recently. I found myself explaining a connection between 2 seemingly unrelated archetypes and deities. When it comes to purpose, to identify as a part of an established religion, means part of your purpose is laid out, it is given to you. If you fight for a God, or a belief system, you are part of something bigger, composed of other groups. But if you choose to stand alone, if you stray from the crowd and do your own exploration, searching and seeking, you very well may unearth some incredibly different solutions and conclusions from the ones handed to you by more established groups.

In the title, I link the idea of Jesus, rather than the story of him, with the story of the Ascended Master and then from there I move to the idea of the shaman. There are some reasons for consciously linking all this together.

One aspect of shamanic healing that should be noted is the tendency a shaman has often from living on the outskirts of the village, or away from cities and “civilized” society, to be creating and living in a reality that is unfamiliar to those who live with conformity and are comfortable with it. They must live that way so that their relationship to the spirit world is much more heightened and complex so that when someone is sick, the shaman can be called in to facilitate healing. One great method to do so, is that the shaman sucks the pain, poison or illness out of the patient, into his or her body, cures the malady in the body, and spits it out.

Now, here is the magical link. Jesus, who is called many things by many people, is believed to have come to earth to take on the pain, sin, suffering and wrongdoing by all of humanity, then he is said to die, but to come back to show his mastery over human death and then to bring that which his sacrifice aimed to fix or heal, back to God or to the Spirit. A shaman does this type of service in a different way, for a village, or on a smaller scale than the whole planet. Jesus is thought to be the one who takes on the whole planet’s pain and “sin”.

The energy 0f humanity as a whole is able to dictate, with a collective conscience and need, who and what will manifest in our favor. We all had shamanic teachers and healers, in every tradition all over the world. The suffering that arose from people has always called medicine and truth in many forms to address and cure the suffering. We evolved beyond the shaman or medicine person for a village, because this is the modern world. Now we look to figures such as Jesus, who, we are told can withstand the depth of our human needs and the shaman on his or her own, continues to work more locally, while Ascended Masters are those who take on the poison, pain, fear and negativity on the most massive levels that humanity can contain it its formidable shadow nature.

Where do you and I come in? We live in all manner of light places and dark places. Some seek the life of Spirit, some are content with the material, physical world. My offering to you contains this link between these concepts and the bigger reality, and it can serve to awaken us to the energy needing to be infused back into our hearts, lives, and communities. If only on a metaphorical level we can lift the veils of separation between isolated groups, so that once again we feel the great relief of sucking out the poison that harms us, on multiple levels, curing it in ourselves, in which ever sacred way makes sense to you, and spitting it out, like a shaman, like a Being of Light and Healing. If this resonates, so be it. If not, there is perfection in that too.

Samhain 2016 #waterislife #nativelivesmatter #blacklivesmatter

they say the veils are thin
they say ancestors are closer
they are peeking in

reach out to the past
find it swirled away like smoke circles do not last

reach out to the future to find
it has yet to be designed

seep into the cotton surrounding of the present
you called yourself here
to be alive to witness

humans remembering to be in awe of the buffalo
in awe of those bison
in awe of the eagle
in awe of each other
creating space and then more space
for those joining the fights
with peace and reverence in our minds
enduring the violent ignorance
of state sanctioned violence
militarized opposition to
the protection of Water

we tell the stories
we are the tricksters, the magicians
we are the stories
we eat and drink and breathe the stories
we are sustained by transformation
we always were
we always will be

Interesting perspective on Life and Death and Afterlife- Enjoy!

(I did not write this but I found it online and if you want to know the author you could look it up pretty easily)


1. Life on earth isn’t a punishment for your past transgressions.  You aren’t acting out some type of I-did-something-wrong-to-you-in-another-life-and-I’m-paying-for-it-now kind of thing. It doesn’t really work like that. That concept of an eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth karmic equalizing of the score isn’t the real deal.
2. You chose your life circumstances before you were born for soul-type reasons that are almost impossible to understand while you’re on earth. If you understood these reasons, life would lose some of its punch, and that losing of punch is a little bit of what enlightenment is all about.
3. Everything changes. When you die, you realize how much. You also realize there are immortal things, things you take with you, and they change too. The Eastern concept of Maya, or illusion, what does that really mean? It means temporary.
4. Life is great, even the hard parts. And we all do things that we call mistakes. But so-called mistakes are ok. They’re just part of the earth deal.
5. You’re meant to engage in all kinds of things on earth, things that may not make sense from a human point of view. So, take a moment before you judge yourself or your fellow man too harshly. Being completely non-judgmental while you’re alive is very advanced, though. You’d have to be a Buddha to be that advanced.
6. There isn’t only one right way for things to turn out. Some endings are happier, some not so happy, but it’s not just the happiness percentage that matters. It’s the music of it.
7. Society teaches limitation. No matter what you’ve been taught, everything you ever need is already inside you. And who you really are is far beyond your comprehension. That’s why living squeezed into the human experience can be painful at times.
8. At the center of everything is an energy, an immaterial material called LOVE. Wow, and how good it feels, this LOVE. You can’t imagine it. You really can’t. There is no way for you to experience the full power of LOVE while you’re on this plane. .
9. Death isn’t as serious as you think it is. It’s actually very enjoyable. Couldn’t be better really. And saying goodbye to the people you love isn’t as serious as it seems either, because you will meet again.

Medicine and the Call To Action

I will start by saying, I do not know exactly what a soul is.

Next, I will tell you, I believe in soul loss and in soul retrieval. I know that I have assisted folks in getting parts of their soul back in their bodies after a long list of what it was that could have caused soul loss for them in the first place, leaving them, in many cases not knowing exactly what is missing or why.

Most people experience some sort of soul loss, in the course of her or his life. Some common reasons for this could be: connection to a person or people who absorb/take the chi or life force energy from someone who is either not aware what to do or that it is happening. One need not believe in energy to be affected by it. Similarly, one does not have to believe in Liver Cancer to die from it. Or, one need not believe in the cleansing properties of water or white sage smoke, to be cleansed by both.

Another cause of soul loss could be a pattern developed over time by someone who means well but continuously gives so much of themselves that there is not enough left for them. This could happen when someone is in love, they leave their body part way to send love and energy to the object of their affection but they are not careful to replenish and restore themselves after working with their energy in this way, a way they could not even explain much of the time. This sort of issue and related issues are dramatically common.

I have heard the word "soul" in many different contexts. People refer to the soul when they want to reference deep emotions, spiritual type contracts with other humans. They apply it to types of songs, a whole genre of music is called "soul". We even hear terms like "soul food". It seems that the word soul has been used to apply to so very many things that it has become hard for someone like me, seeking clarity, accuracy, authenticity and truth to give a definition of the word, one that can be used and agreed upon in more than one or two social circles.

We have heard about the belief that there is a God who wants to save our souls.

Our souls have been likened to energy, light, eternal spirits, our conscience, our deepest selves, our truest selves. There are quite a lot of ways people define this word. And yet, most of the time it gets tossed around as though we all know exactly what it means.

Clearly, we do not. We do not all subscribe to the Abrahamic faiths (Christianity, Islam, Judaism) and we do not all describe or define that which we are told is the soul in the same way.

What about the atheist or agnostic perspective? What about folks who believe in Gods and Goddesses, or just one Great Goddess? If I pray and I take gender out of the picture, by saying Great Spirit or Great Mystery or just simply "Spirit", does that take away the legitimacy of my definitions of that which has mostly been attributed to the type of God that is signed up to save this soul entity, and give us redemption, one and all?

These perspectives are considered to be in the minority but all over the world, they count for more than Americans realize. So, an Atheist, Agnostic, Pagan or others can take the word soul and bend it to fit what they experience as "soul". They can render it into a poem, the poem creates symbols, the symbols create new meanings.

Since meanings of words are often manipulated to fit certain agendas, it is only logical and natural that folks whose views are considered marginalized will find ways to bend the meanings of religious spiritual and even medical terms. These words are the terms we work with from the time we can start comprehending them.

So, why not create and spread the meanings of words on our own terms? By this I mean that spiritually and intellectually marginalized parts of the population find it necessary to redefine and reclaim terms that have been appropriated by more socially acceptable and generally more mainstream groups.

Another term we more commonly hear now, but in a new way, is "medicine". It still of course refers to what we think of, a course of antibiotics, pain killers like Tylenol and Motrin. However, in many cases, folks say these are not medicines, they are ways of masking the pain, curing nothing, healing nothing. The criticism of these Western medicine options gets massive backlash. I understand that. I am in awe of what many forms of Western Medicine and Western treatments can do for people who have a wide range of illnesses, chronic conditions and pain.

Yet there are authors such as Masuru Emoto, who discusses all sickness and wellness on the spectrum, as a form of hado. Hado is hard to translate but essentially points to the vibrational or subtle bodies of a person, animal, even a type of music or song. He is famous for, among other things, taking pictures of water crystals and with the naked eye, one can see how the crystal was affected by what was sung or spoken to it.

He created example after example, showing us that water has an energy and vibration that is receptive to and takes on the energy of what is projected toward it or what happens around it, keeping in mind that our bodies are immersed in vibrations with their own "hado" or subtle vibration with its own information and meanings. He even suggests music as possible treatments, and many people now incorporate music into many types of sessions.

If humanity truly evolves, we will be able to sidestep the battles, with each other and with ourselves and integrate that which works together and in harmony within numerous treatment plans, and in so doing, we will manifest an East and West compilation of offerings to those who are unwell, for an endless number of reasons.

The rejections of ideas and scornful disbelief going back and forth between Eastern practitioners and their advocates, and Western Practioners and their staunch advocates, are exactly what is keeping us from developing comprehensive packages for people who suffer from preventable, reversible suffering and disease.

Now, we can take a look at Folk medicine, or Ancient medicines in modern contexts and Holistic practices in Indigenous spaces. These include possible kinds of shamanism and many other ways that are lost to the more modern and urban communities. The "medicine" coming from these folks, and even the word "medicine" the way it is used by marginalized groups, is tightly bound in the context of culture and often tribe that it originates from.

With a conscious extraction of a term from its cultural and spiritual origins there is often pain and controversy. If anyone now says " medicine" and applies it broadly, claiming that an energy or a piece of art, or a type of love falls into this category may not know who they are borrowing from.

Controversy is good for us, but not if it is constant. If it pours light on a subject, a problem and effective discussions follow it, we are doing well. If controversy becomes overwhelming between two folks or even between groups of people, it has lost its most critical function. That function is to stir up feelings so that collectively we match up thoughts, ideas and emotions until there is a great exhale and letting go of what originally caused the battle.

When we move away from the discomfort of controversy, we should be taking away new emotional and spiritual contracts from the situation, a deeper understanding of why the negative feelings came up and what could be done on both sides to create solutions that work as well as can be at that time.

Allowing wounds to fester, with no real dialogue for solutions, allowing pain and resentment to build, without any functional and grounded forums to help people along their way toward what truly feels like justice, #reservationpoverty #blacklivesmatter #waterislife, rifts between individuals and groups just grow wider and the canyons between grow deeper.

I do not know what a soul exactly is.

However, my soul, however defined or left undefined, urges me to a Call to Action.. Complacency is stagnation. Stagnation creates disease. Movements, both physical and political, have the power to save our lives and improve our communities.

This Call to Action is sent out every time my whole being feels weighed down by the violence, injustice and the insanity of trying  the same thing over and over expecting different outcomes.

There is no election year, no attempt at an uncorrupted democracy that can come anywhere near the urgency of the Call to Action that I hear from deep within. If this resonates with you, take action, any action: small, medium, large. Start right where you are, and keep going.