smoke and flames

 A survivor will 

put weight on their body

like armor

keeping predators and others

away if they can.

A survivor will lose weight

So, you cannot get access

to the softness that 

was violated and betrayed.

A survivor will split from 

themselves

Body goes in one direction

Mind and heart go elsewhere.

A survivor will do

what it takes

to make it through

intact. 

And when they realize they

are not fully intact, that

part of them has slipped away

they might search for it

or just accept that it's lost. 

Survivors have some 

choices to make.

Shut down, open up

swim faster

sink to the bottom.

All are fair reactions

to the fractured self

the wounded self

the one who might

divorce from reality, so

they can come back

with some sanity. 

Some of us 

make it look easy

but that is never the case

we mend what is broken

with tools we forged

from the ashes of the pain

we torched.

warming ourselves by

the fire 

watching flames and 

smoke go up 

higher and higher, finally

back to the place of 

endings and beginnings

winding together

loss and wholeness

Appreciate it

We can build 

stone by stone

a castle of protection

around your heart

but 

will it keep you 

safe from you?

I can crush all 

your enemies

while you sleep, so 

you can dream unbothered

and quietly.

But will it 

set you free?

I can give you sight 

to see any type of motive

hidden by deceptions

but will that make you

wise?

I wish to construct a 

world for you to flourish in

but if you have never 

known differently

will you 

appreciate it?

I can hold your hand

until we begin to mimic 

happiness

but at what cost?

Only when you arrive

at the shores of your own

vulnerability

and your own 

powers, your own

creativity,

only then 

will we part and 

let go

all the way

let go 

without looking back.

until we find each other 

again, one day, one night

with new language, and

refreshed sight

Author's note:

This is written from the perspective of the Universal Goddess who cannot be named.

better

Thousands of years have passed 

and you are still muttering about 

old promises

but

we never seem to get there

so far

and I do not know how many

more centuries or thousands of years 

I can wait. 

Destroy the dams

let the rivers flow, no matter 

if lives and homes are lost

beneath rushing water

fresh water

or salt water when we get

to the ocean side and the 

waves swell up

All of this, I foresaw. 

I have foreseen all of the natural disasters

(as they are called) but I know

they are fierce and wrathful, raging tears 

falling down the face of the earth

like rain onto rocks

some jagged; some smooth, catching the

raindrops in the dry crevices

light gray into dark black

but nothing is bleak 

about this destruction

it must be done

and just as I foresaw it

I will again dream

a new reality from

the tenuous and tenacious one

that has a hold on your psyche 

but not mine

I am blissfully free of distractions

I hover in the flames of fire that consume

I am storms sweeping 

over the dry crackling fields

and all of this will bring relief and peace

although it looks and feels apocalyptic

trust me, it gets better from here. 

Author's note:

This is written from the perspective of the Universal Goddess who cannot be named.