as I see it, I have poured a whole lot of breath into this blog
I have 2 short pieces. one is the piece I first read at Café International. the host was Ramu Aki. he was known for his colorful attire and commanding presence.
De donde eres? ------------
where does the poetry come from
reside originate begin in my body
not necessarily from my head or heart. probably
my fingers or lower back
ancient as blood as rivers of truth
running red and deep through our veins
poetry has a pulse, it is a living breathing entity
which allows me to be a vessel for its power
it is the way the ancestors speak to all of us
so listen carefully for their whispers
their laughter
their warnings
------------------------
Dear Santa Claus,
I have been a good girl this year. It's all relative though, isn't it?
We are not so different you and I. We are jolly and generous.
You are a Sagittarius, maybe? I have a Sagittarius rising.
About my gifts, perhaps a laptop would be the best way to go.
College practically requires I have one.
It has been good working with you. Your attention to this matter is appreciated.
You know where to find me.
Yours truly, Juliana
Friday, June 16, 2017
page 2
Who really needs another analysis of rape culture? I certainly do not want to write one.
Instead, looking at what people are doing to change the whole dream of this planet is the only reasonable choice moving forward. There should be a time and a place to lay out what the problems are, the severity and the intricacy of them.
There also must be a time to look at what is already happening that could change the whole picture.
Staying in a place of rage, dissecting the sickness that got us here, this is not an option for me. I know others who have seen similar situations, felt similar feelings. We move on from the rage because we would self destruct or destroy others if we did not, and that is a fact. Anger teaches us, but rage is a level of anger that consumes our minds and bodies. I learned, I could not stay in that place of pain without at some point causing more.
part 2
weakness versus strength in survivors
we hear "you are so strong" I know this is intended as encouragement and there is a massive shortage of things to say that help. ask the survivor, can I say....? Their mood might swing all around the place.
Make it safe for their moods to do that.
there are endless possibilities that say who we are. too many form beliefs despite a glaring lack of evidence.
many are liminal, stuck in limbo, or bardo, purgatory, you know the story.
end---
Instead, looking at what people are doing to change the whole dream of this planet is the only reasonable choice moving forward. There should be a time and a place to lay out what the problems are, the severity and the intricacy of them.
There also must be a time to look at what is already happening that could change the whole picture.
Staying in a place of rage, dissecting the sickness that got us here, this is not an option for me. I know others who have seen similar situations, felt similar feelings. We move on from the rage because we would self destruct or destroy others if we did not, and that is a fact. Anger teaches us, but rage is a level of anger that consumes our minds and bodies. I learned, I could not stay in that place of pain without at some point causing more.
part 2
weakness versus strength in survivors
we hear "you are so strong" I know this is intended as encouragement and there is a massive shortage of things to say that help. ask the survivor, can I say....? Their mood might swing all around the place.
Make it safe for their moods to do that.
there are endless possibilities that say who we are. too many form beliefs despite a glaring lack of evidence.
many are liminal, stuck in limbo, or bardo, purgatory, you know the story.
end---
Thursday, June 15, 2017
From 2014
There is no true beginning that came from nothing------------
Do I start with the fact that the mistakes of the grown ups around are mostly what led to my introduction to rape culture? I entered into it naïve and unarmed instead of prepared and somewhat aware as others would have been.
Do I start with the stories themselves? I could give example after example of young men who did not fit some stereotypical rapist profile, using my openness, vulnerability, trust and kindness as weapons against me? Does this mean I am foolish and they are born predators? Or does it mean they are so disconnected from how to engage in ethical sexual encounters, that they were not taught or trained to need or even want consent? Let us set the record straight right now, consensual sex is redundant. There is sex, implying consent in its definition and there is rape. A misconception is that it is not rape unless a weapon is present?
My guess is that most of rape victims do not want to give anyone the satisfaction of seeing them succumb so fully to the twisted dysfunction of harming or killing the rapist. Our society is sickly voyeuristic and systematically desensitized from these cases.
End- Page 1.
Do I start with the fact that the mistakes of the grown ups around are mostly what led to my introduction to rape culture? I entered into it naïve and unarmed instead of prepared and somewhat aware as others would have been.
Do I start with the stories themselves? I could give example after example of young men who did not fit some stereotypical rapist profile, using my openness, vulnerability, trust and kindness as weapons against me? Does this mean I am foolish and they are born predators? Or does it mean they are so disconnected from how to engage in ethical sexual encounters, that they were not taught or trained to need or even want consent? Let us set the record straight right now, consensual sex is redundant. There is sex, implying consent in its definition and there is rape. A misconception is that it is not rape unless a weapon is present?
My guess is that most of rape victims do not want to give anyone the satisfaction of seeing them succumb so fully to the twisted dysfunction of harming or killing the rapist. Our society is sickly voyeuristic and systematically desensitized from these cases.
End- Page 1.
an old story
you were so transparent, that was why I thought I loved you.
I could spin endlessly into the depths of what your eyes reflected.
The words you chose and
the touch you could render to mean more than you knew.
All of that was transparent
Maybe it happened so a writer could have a muse
we are such longing creatures, no?
Our longing outlasts other experiences, or so I say, who is to say?
moments fling themselves into thoughts
I am flailing so I do not attach myself to more distraction
when you, your hands on my hips, said "I want to be with you so much"
I just walked away and stilled myself. stop.
you were transparent like nobody else I knew at that time
That was why I thought I loved you
Now I realize the fleeting rush were illusions fed by fantasies
of a love you never even felt
and yes I was shown all this and yes I have nothing to miss
I could spin endlessly into the depths of what your eyes reflected.
The words you chose and
the touch you could render to mean more than you knew.
All of that was transparent
Maybe it happened so a writer could have a muse
we are such longing creatures, no?
Our longing outlasts other experiences, or so I say, who is to say?
moments fling themselves into thoughts
I am flailing so I do not attach myself to more distraction
when you, your hands on my hips, said "I want to be with you so much"
I just walked away and stilled myself. stop.
you were transparent like nobody else I knew at that time
That was why I thought I loved you
Now I realize the fleeting rush were illusions fed by fantasies
of a love you never even felt
and yes I was shown all this and yes I have nothing to miss
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